January 3, 2011
December 5, 2009
This guy was charged with committing lewd acts to a child under the age of 14.
….Wait, I thought you were dead?

This guy was charged with committing lewd acts to a child under the age of 14.

….Wait, I thought you were dead?

December 4, 2009
Something tells me their idea of father-son bonding isn’t a weekend of camping, fishing and eating s’mores next to a roaring fire, unless that roaring fire is fueled by the blood of women and children.
As for the tattoos? Dad will never forgive Junior for choosing Shasta Pride over White Pride.
"Goddamnit, you goddamned knucklehead! I sent you to the tattoo parlor with fifty bucks and you come back with THIS?”
What’s even more odd is that they weren’t arrested on the same day, nor for the same charge. The father committed robbery, and almost two weeks later the son decided it’d been too long since he’d beat up a woman.
Those Jimmie Lee Joneses. Rotten to the core!

Something tells me their idea of father-son bonding isn’t a weekend of camping, fishing and eating s’mores next to a roaring fire, unless that roaring fire is fueled by the blood of women and children.

As for the tattoos? Dad will never forgive Junior for choosing Shasta Pride over White Pride.

"Goddamnit, you goddamned knucklehead! I sent you to the tattoo parlor with fifty bucks and you come back with THIS?”

What’s even more odd is that they weren’t arrested on the same day, nor for the same charge. The father committed robbery, and almost two weeks later the son decided it’d been too long since he’d beat up a woman.

Those Jimmie Lee Joneses. Rotten to the core!

December 3, 2009
"It’s okay, you guys, it’s all part of the script. This is the scene where I get arrested for doing something outrageous while I solve the case of who put the pig’s blood in the girl’s kool-aid and now she’s in a coma or something. OWWWW my leg! Yeah, it’s all part of the plan.
Wait, where am I?”

"It’s okay, you guys, it’s all part of the script. This is the scene where I get arrested for doing something outrageous while I solve the case of who put the pig’s blood in the girl’s kool-aid and now she’s in a coma or something. OWWWW my leg! Yeah, it’s all part of the plan.

Wait, where am I?”

December 2, 2009
Why do I only hear sound effects when I look at this picture?

Why do I only hear sound effects when I look at this picture?

December 1, 2009
"No way ossifer, I ain’t drunk. If I was, was I be able tuh smile liek THIS?!"

"No way ossifer, I ain’t drunk. If I was, was I be able tuh smile liek THIS?!"

November 30, 2009
This man’s name is Zeus. I’m not joking. He was arrested for burglary.

"Buh-but, it doesn’t make any sense! How do you burglarize something that’s already yours? I’m fucking ZEUS! I’ll get you for this, Poseidon!"

This man’s name is Zeus. I’m not joking. He was arrested for burglary.

"Buh-but, it doesn’t make any sense! How do you burglarize something that’s already yours? I’m fucking ZEUS! I’ll get you for this, Poseidon!"

"Wait, no… I can explain!"

"Wait, no… I can explain!"

November 29, 2009
When trolling the inmate databases, you’ll often come across the charge “FTA,” which stands for “Failure to Appear.” Sometimes this acronym will precede the phrase “After Written Promise.”
I can only imagine what these written promises sound like.


"Dear Judge,
I PROMISE to appear in court tomorrow.
Yours Truly,
Flattop Jones”

When trolling the inmate databases, you’ll often come across the charge “FTA,” which stands for “Failure to Appear.” Sometimes this acronym will precede the phrase “After Written Promise.”

I can only imagine what these written promises sound like.

"Dear Judge,

I PROMISE to appear in court tomorrow.

Yours Truly,

Flattop Jones”

November 28, 2009
So that’s what happened to Darlene after she went off to college…

So that’s what happened to Darlene after she went off to college…